Stephen Colbert on Republicans and abortion bans: ‘Backpedaling like a tweaked-out unicycle chimp’

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Stephen Colbert on Republicans and abortion bans: ‘Backpedaling like a tweaked-out unicycle chimp’

Late-night hosts talked Arizona’s 1864 abortion ban, Trump’s backpedaling on overturning Roe v Wade and Joe Biden’s state dinner with the prime minister of Japan.

Stephen Colbert

Stephen Colbert didn’t mince phrases when it got here to the Arizona supreme courtroom voting to reinstate a 160-year-old abortion ban. “That’s loopy,” the Late Present host stated on Wednesday. “However bear in mind, it’s Arizona, so it’s a dry loopy.”

The courtroom dominated that as a result of Roe v Wade had been overturned, there was nothing stopping them from imposing the 1864 legislation, which was handed earlier than ladies had the best to vote. “To which the Arizona supreme courtroom stated, ‘don’t fear – we’ll work on that one subsequent,’” Colbert joked.

The legislation is so previous, the truth is, that it predates the invention of the cowboy hat, the urinal, the paper clip, the machine that makes paper baggage and Arizona as a state. “You possibly can’t implement state legal guidelines from earlier than it was a state!” Colbert exclaimed. “Should you may, individuals in Massachusetts could possibly be arrested for failure to buckle hat.”

The ruling, by an all-Republican courtroom, is anticipated to backfire on the poll field, the place it is going to in all probability face a referendum this November. For the reason that supreme courtroom overturned Roe v Wade in June 2022, “this ruling has been a catastrophe for all of the Republicans’ makes an attempt to maintain suburban voters,” Colbert defined. “So GOP candidates are actually backpedaling like a tweaked-out unicycle chimp.

The far-right Arizona Senate candidate Kari Lake, for instance, introduced she opposed the ruling and known as on the legislature to “provide you with a direct commonsense resolution that Arizonans can assist”.

“Which is a shocking place to take,” Colbert famous, as a result of earlier than the Dobbs resolution, Lake bragged that Arizona “already has nice laws on the books” in order that “Arizona is not going to be a state the place abortions are occurring.”

Seth Meyers

On Late Night time, Seth Meyers blasted Trump’s try and reasonable his stance on abortion after securing the tip of Roe. “There could possibly be no escaping accountability. Trump informed everybody he would overturn Roe, he nominated three justices who overturned Roe, after which he bragged about overturning Roe,” he stated.

“Usually, it could be very exhausting to pin one thing on Trump as a result of he’s so good at wriggling his method out of every part, however that is as simple because it will get,” he continued. “It’s like a kind of conspiracy idea boards with one string going straight from Trump to Roe.

“And but Trump is now making an attempt to trick everybody into considering he’s truly a reasonable on abortion who opposes a nationwide abortion ban,” he added, after Arizona’s “grotesque” ruling reinvigorating a close to complete abortion ban from 1864. “What the fuck – states can implement legal guidelines written earlier than they had been even states?!” Meyers fumed. “Does that imply any state within the Louisiana Buy is now topic to the legal guidelines of 18th-century France?

“That is precisely the state of affairs Trump stated he helps – leaving it as much as the states,” Meyers stated. Certainly, after the ruling, Trump informed reporters: “As you realize it’s all about states’ rights, that’ll be straightened out.”

“What do you imply it is going to get straightened out?! You broke it! That is your fault,” Meyers retorted. “We had a landmark supreme courtroom ruling in place that protected the well being and bodily autonomy of all People, and also you undid it. You don’t get to clog a rest room at a celebration after which say ‘I believe we are able to all agree another person will repair it.’”

Jimmy Kimmel

And in Los Angeles, Jimmy Kimmel recapped Joe Biden’s state dinner with the prime minister of Japan and his spouse. “His state dinners are a bit of totally different than ordinary,” Kimmel joked. “For one factor, they begin at 4.30, and you’ll solely get in if in case you have a Groupon.”

The dinner, which was in honor of the Washington cherry bushes gifted by Japan in 1912, was graced with leisure by Paul Simon. “That’s large. Trump was fortunate to get the surviving members of O-City for considered one of his state dinners, however Japan bought a night of Simon and Joe-funkel,” stated Kimmel.

Trump, in the meantime, “took a break from making an attempt to derail his porn star hush-money trial” to make a shock cease at a Chick-fil-A in Atlanta. “He likes to go in to fast-food eating places and purchase everybody meals like an enormous shot,” Kimmel famous. “He purchased 30 milkshakes and a few hen after which began passing it round.”

Trump additionally took the time to proclaim that he “did every part” to assist traditionally Black faculties and universities (HBCUs). “Only a former president muttering, ‘I did every part, I did every part,’ to himself at a fast-food hen restaurant,” Kimmel laughed. “Nothing uncommon there!”


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