Just a few years in the past the arrival of a Barbie film powered by feminism might need appeared about as seemingly because the plaything giving up her Dreamhouse and pink convertible for a studio flat in Croydon and a dependable secondhand Prius. But right here we’re within the period of Greta Gerwig’s playfully subversive movie having taken greater than $1bn on the international field workplace. Life within the Hollywood fantasy sandbox may by no means be fairly the identical once more.
We should always all be removed from shocked, then, to notice this week that the following powerhouse toy-based important darling is gently taking form. Is it Denis Villeneuve’s arty and intense remodeling of the life story of Slinky Canine? Or maybe Lena Dunham’s nostalgic, feminist tackle Polly Pocket (nope, the Ladies creator pulled out of that one earlier in the summertime). Is Michel Gondry up for bringing us Nerf Wars: the Film?
Actually, the information is that Alison Brie, the Golden Globe-nominated star of Mad Males, Glow and Promising Younger Girl will likely be taking part in the nefarious Skeletor’s right-hand lady Evil-Lyn in an forthcoming adaptation of Masters of the Universe (AKA He-Man), which will likely be directed by at least Kubo and the Two Strings’ Travis Knight. Sure, you learn that proper, and whereas this isn’t fairly up there with the prospect of Daniel Day-Lewis popping out of retirement to play Bob the Builder for Martin Scorsese, it’s not that far off, both.
In my youth, I used to like He-Man. Whereas he was basically a muscle-bound blond viking with the haircut of a Eighties information anchor who wears furry underpants and spends his weekends yelling “I’ve the facility!”, there was one thing concerning the cosmic world of Eternia and its far-out mix of foolish area fantasy and fiercely unlikely sci-fi that made children determined to tune within the following week. Plus, the synth-tastic soundtrack was unbelievable.
I even had a one armed model of Man-at-Arms – probably the canine received to him. However till lately I by no means imagined that greater than 40 years later, the Prince of Eternia can be on the centre of the Hollywood galaxy another time. In spite of everything, we already had the fiercely po-faced and clunky 1987 Masters of the Universe film, starring Dolph Lundgren as He-Man and (unbelievably) Frank Langella as Skeletor. And that, frankly, was fairly sufficient.
The brilliance of Barbie was that Gerwig managed to ship up the pneumatic doll whereas by some means additionally celebrating her. The film’s important message is that whereas we get that the beautiful, joyously airheaded doll is a manifestation of the evil patriarchy, we love her anyway, as a result of it’s hardly her fault. And wouldn’t it’s great if she charmingly stood as much as the very male-dominated system that spawned her?
It’s onerous to think about He-Man ploughing fairly the identical meta-infused, self-referential furrow. It is a universe the place a person rides an enormous inexperienced tiger into battle, whereas a man named Fisto punches issues as a result of … properly, he has an enormous metallic fist. As we speak’s Hollywood execs may have a look at all this and see depth, however the actuality is that there’ll should be some critical work completed on the Masters of the Universe mythos if we’re all out of the blue going to swallow Brie’s Evil-Lyn participating in a monologue about energy buildings that might make Foucault proud whereas Man-at-Arms gently ponders the existential futility of everlasting conflict.
But, it’s additionally attainable to think about how, in the appropriate arms, Masters of the Universe could be ripe for forward-thinking, culturally adept satire. If Barbie is the stereotypical archetype of a lady, as seen by younger ladies who haven’t realised that they’re viewing your entire world via a male-curated prism, absolutely He-Man is her XY chromosomed equal. Are preteen boys preternaturally designed to think about it’s inconceivable to be a hero except you’re keen to destroy your well being via excessive steroid use, or is the world they’ve grown up in telling them this?
Why does the wimpy Adam of Eternia have to remodel into the impossibly hunky and muscley He-Man earlier than he can truly get something completed? Maybe Adam and Cringer (the pathetic alter ego of area tiger Battle Cat) can emerge because the true heroes of Masters of the Universe, gaining the keys to the cosmos through a balanced view of gender politics and deep understanding of the nuances of female energy and management, slightly than simply smashing Skeletor’s cranium with a sword.
In spite of everything, if Barbie can Rollerblade via the patriarchy in a neon haze, absolutely He-Man can swap his eternally clenched jaw and outsized biceps obsession for a self-help podcast binge and a heart-to-heart with She-Ra – to not point out a little bit of primary emotional intelligence.
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