This movie is the completely mirthless equal of somebody who takes you out to dinner, buys a horrible meal, retains cracking garbage jokes after which pokes you within the ribs each 10 minutes as they repeatedly ask (with out listening for a solution): “Isn’t this enjoyable? Isn’t this enjoyable?” No, it’s not enjoyable. Not even in a so-bad-it’s-good means.
A roster of expertise that has both seen extra superb days – director Renny Harlin, stars Pierce Brosnan, Nick Cannon and Tim Roth – or are about to have their careers mildly blighted by affiliation – youthful forged members Jamie Chung, Hermione Corfield, Mike Angelo and Rami Jabar – are assembled for a half-baked heist plot set in, as somebody describes sneeringly, “some nation referred to as Jazeristan”. In an excruciating feat of cognitive dissonance, unhealthy religion and ailing manners, the movie manages to depict the Arab world as one principally populated by wealthy funders of terror and bumbling suckers, whereas utilizing eye-candy places in Abu Dhabi and Dubai so as to add a veneer of glamour.
The steal is being organised by a posse calling themselves the Misfits (even the deal with appears maladroit as a result of all of them seem to be regular, boring, equally implausible film characters) who steal from the wealthy to assist the oppressed. Their chief is the movie’s on-off narrator Ringo (Cannon), and his crew, made up of man-hating feminine murderer Violet (Chung), explosives knowledgeable Wick (Angelo) and a token good Center Japanese chap identified solely because the Prince (Jabar) group up with grasp con-artist Tempo (Brosnan) and his idealistic daughter Hope (Corfield) to interrupt right into a Jazeristani jail run by English baddie Schultz (Roth) to steal a bunch of gold. A lot half-hearted banter and lots of montages ensue.
In the long run, this has all of the joie de vivre of an airport in the midst of the night time after all of the tax-free retailers and eating places have closed. And ready for it to complete is like sitting bored on a tough plastic chair after which realising your cellphone has run out of battery however the charger is packed in a suitcase you already checked in. Actually terrible.
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